Thursday, February 03, 2011

Classics in a Minute

OK, if you are like me, right about now you're tired of being stuck indoors and need a new site to look at. Was everyone in the world on facebook and Webkinz yesterday? Webkinz took forever to load, and if one more person posted a picture of their snowy backyard on FB, my laptop was going to blow.

Well, I read a number of book sites when I can, but for the first time yesterday I stumbled across Book-A-Minute Classics. Oh man, funny, funny stuff. You've got to check it out--whether you love the classics or hate them. It's just what it sounds like, summarizing the classics in a minute or less. Of course I first had to look up books I hate. Here are a couple:

The Old Man and the Sea by Ernest Hemingway:

An old man catches a fish that's too big for his boat. The fish gets eaten by sharks. Then he goes home and DIES.



Moby Dick by Herman Melville

Ishmael: Call me Ishmael.

Captain Ahab: Crew, we will seek the white whale and kill it, because I am insane.

Crew: Alas, your destructive obsession will be our undoing.

(They almost find the white whale. Then they almost find the white whale. Then they find it.)

Captain Ahab: I stab at thee. I stab at thee.

(Everybody dies except Ishmael, although this is no surprise, because it was foreshadowed CONTINUALLY from the BEGINNING.)



The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger

Holden Caulfield: Angst angst angst swear curse swear crazy crazy angst swear curse, society sucks, and I'm a stupid jerk.


I'll just give you one more because you need to check it out for yourself (there are lots of books on there). This is definitely not a book I hate, it's a book I love and am struck by its brilliance every time I read it, but I fell down laughing reading its synopsis.

The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald

Gatsby: Daisy, I made all this money for you because I love you.

Daisy: I cannot reciprocate because I represent the American Dream.

Gatsby: Now I must die because I also represent the American Dream.

(Gatsby DIES.)

Nick: I hate New Yorkers.


Check it out!


Alysa said...

oh this is FABULOUS. very funny. loved all of them! i'll go check out the site.

Melanie said...

Awesome stuff! Thanks for the lift!